One year ago...

Wow.  What a year.  It's been exactly one year ago today that I heard the words "You have Cancer.".  MAN WAS I EVER PISSED!  I remember thinking to myself....how the hell can she (she being my OB-GYN) know I have Cancer from just an ultrasound?!?  She should be more careful about just throwing that word around.....  I promptly got on the phone and called my Primary Care Physician because she had pulled me thru my relationship crap and I had gotten quite close to her.

To my dismay I learned that ultrasounds have come quite a long way since my Mom was diagnosed and, yes, in fact you CAN tell if a mass is Cancer.

FUCK!

I absolutely did NOT know what to do.  I remember just looking up to the sky and screaming "REALLY?!?!".

Fast forward to today.  This happened this morning....

 

And the grand finale for extra credit....I did this!  In purple spandex!  WOO HOO!!!  

 I then went to visit my tie dye dude at the flea market to tell him I survived!  He was estatic.  I have 3 new tie dye shirts.  I also ran into an agility friend at Sassool by coincidence so we had lunch together!  She knew my parents so it was no coincidence that I happened to run in to her TODAY.

I could have shriveled up in to a dark corner and just given up on life last year.  I sure had PLENTY to kick me down....but instead I choose life!  And I.... 

Bertha, you are not welcome here anymore.  

Always forward, never back,

❤,
Bubba
CEO of Save My Ass Technologies, Inc.

A day filled with beauty and peace

WOW!  What a fantabulous day today!  This morning started early with a 5K, followed by yoga (my first time ever), then finishing with a sound bath meditation.  I am not kidding when I say this...I walked away from this event feeling better than I have in my entire life!  Something really, really, REALLY good is going on inside and I am LOVING it!  

For one thing, I am surrounding myself with happy, positive people who bring out the best in me.  It makes a HUGE difference!  And when I'm at peace, people just gravitate to me.  For the 5K, I was walking with a friend who is as directionally challenged as I am....but we had these two Indian ladies walking with us, total strangers, who kept us on track.  We joked that she was our living, breathing GPS!  We'd get ahead of them, start jibber-jabbering, forget where we were, then when we came to a fork in the path, the lady behind us would yell "RIGHT!" or "LEFT"!  LOL!  Then when we came towards the end she encouraged us to take the long way back to the parking lot to get the yoga mats because then we'd seize every moment that we could!  These ladies were fantastic and I really think I will see them again.  They are in the yellow and gray t-shirts behind the lady w/the sign.  My 80's ladies are the 3 directly behind me. 

Following the event I stopped at the new juice bar in Wake Forest and gave my body some fresh greens!  YUM!

For the afternoon, I took my neighbor out for an adventure and we found the sunflower fields!  WOWSA!  They were absolutely STUNNING!  Taller than last year!  WOW!

 This one is my absolute FAVORITE!  All you can see is my peace sign!  LOL!

 

And then to wrap up the day, the most majestic butterfly decided to stop by and smell my wildflowers.  It was the most beautiful that I have ever seen.  She had 4 wings and her colors were so vibrant that they made my eyes leak a little.  Nature is so beautiful!  She flew all around me, smelling a lot of the different flowers.  I said to her out loud "you're welcome for the flowers!" :)  It was magic.

The best thing I can do to keep Bertha and all her little wannabees from becoming active again is to keep myself healthy and happy.  Today during the sound bath I imagined my body fighting all the Cancer cells.....and winning....  

Bertha, you are not welcome here anymore.  

Always forward, never back,

❤,
Bubba
CEO of Save My Ass Technologies, Inc.

What The Health?

I watched this show today on Netflix and am more convinced than ever that the Crazy Sexy Diet is the way to go!  ABSOLUTELY!  WOW!

 

Bertha, you are not welcome here anymore.  

Always forward, never back,

❤,
Bubba
CEO of Save My Ass Technologies, Inc.

July 1 is significant

July 1, 2016 marks the day that Dr. Gizzie said the word "Oh." in a way that I will never, EVER forget.  
That was the first moment that Big Bertha was acknowledged.  
It was the day my life took a completely unexpected left turn.  
I had absolutely NO IDEA that what my OB-GYN was feeling was a big ass tumor of Follicular Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma and that I was about to learn the core meaning of life. 
I had just been thru a living hell during the first half of 2016 so I really didn't take what Dr. Gizzie felt seriously.  I was seeing 3 therapists and working so hard on my mental health that I just nodded my head when she told me I needed to go get a ultrasound....

Yea.
Whatever.

Thank GOD that I kept that appointment.
Thank GOD that thru all those therapy sessions I had managed to pick up all the pieces of my life and put them back together differently.  This "new" me was stronger.  MUCH, MUCH STRONGER than I had ever been before.  This new me could handle a diagnosis of Cancer.

I truly believe that there are no coincidences in life.  Everything happens for a reason and sitting here on my porch, hanging out with my pack o' crazy dogs, I must say that life is better than it's ever been....

The people who are in my life right now are AMAZING!  I LOL every single day!
My relationship with my soulmate is better than it's ever been!  I canNOT WAIT to help her plan her wedding!
I actually wore a tank top and SPANDEX out in public, plus my hair was in a headband!  And by the time I got home my stomach hurt because I laughed so much it, literally, hurt!

Yes, I've lost a couple Warriors along the way, but that's their problem, not mine.  The old me would have fretted and worried and jumped thru hoops to make that better...but then that also meant that I was not being my true self.  I was being whatever I thought that person wanted from me so they would still love me.  Now I stand strong on my own and let that shit go.

I went to a birthday party last night and the birthday boy was asked, what he thought about this birthday (he turned 56).  He mentioned a lot of things that he was thankful for, but the one that struck me the most, right in the heart, was he said the 50's have been the best decade of his life!  And it was amazing, but all of us around the table in our 50's started nodding our heads in agreement.  And we all got an immediate smile on our face!  It's SOOOO true!  The 50's ROCK!  And this past year, since my diagnosis, has been phenomenal.  WHODATHUNKIT?!?

So, if you are reading this, I just want to say THANK YOU!  This blog has gotten over 11,000 hits so far which absolutely BLOWS MY MIND!  THANK YOU!  

Thank you for being a Warrior.
Thank you for praying for me, it's working.
Thank you for every smile, thought, email, text, facebook post, card, gift, and happy moment!

I absolutely LOVE my beautiful life and every single person in it!

I could not love these two more....canNOT wait for them to get married!  

Bertha, you are not welcome here anymore.  

Always forward, never back,

❤,
Bubba
CEO of Save My Ass Technologies, Inc.     

A moment when Cancer did NOT suck

For the first time since I was diagnosed a year ago, Cancer did NOT suck....and it's because this happened:

 

Yes, I was stalked!  But in the best way possible!  CHRIS!  OMGosh!  The nurse who has touched me the deepest showed up (VERY UNEXPECTEDLY) at my maintenance treatment!  And not only that, she brought her BRAND NEW BABY and another one of her little beauties!  OMGosh!  All I could think was....

WHAT IS HAPPENING RIGHT NOW?!?! 

I DO NOT WANT TO BE ANYWHERE ELSE THAN RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW!

 LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL!

I was SOOOOO over the moon that it flowed right out of my eyes!  When the heart takes complete control of your body, those things just happen.  And it was freakin' AWESOME!

Bertha, you are not welcome here anymore.  Like, at all!  Nodda.  NOPE!

Always forward, never back,
❤,
Bubba
CEO of Save My Ass Technologies, Inc.