Best Advice Cancer Patients Received During Treatment

Found this.  I love ALL of them.  25 is my favorite and something I already knew.

I've totally got this...

❤️,
Bubba 

The Final Chemo

I am SO ready for the final chemo this week.  

BRING IT! 

*REALLY* hoping I pass all my tests on Tuesday to get the green light for Chemo #6.  Bertha, you've stayed around long enough.  Time for you to GO.

I've totally got this...

❤️,
Bubba 

Time

I'm thinking a lot about time this morning.  Truth be told, Cancer is going to shorten my life.  It just will.  I don't think I'm anywhere close to the end, and I am going to win this round without a shadow of doubt....but this year I feel like I actually looked death in the face for the first time.  It's made me think a lot about how I've spent my life so far and how I want to spend the rest of it.  

What has REALLY helped me realize the importance of time is the most super fantastic gifts from my ABA Warriors.  They, once again, have left me speechless but at the same time have given me the strength to keep fighting this fight.  AND, they have given me the gift of time!  Does it get any better than that?

This gift actually states it at the top "The Gift of Time".  Wow. 

This is to support my fight (I LOVE how it says BUH BYE BERTHA!) and is a donation to help find a cure for this beast that has interrupted my life, and many, many other lives.  Who knows, maybe by the time I have a relapse, this donation will have contributed to a new miracle drug that will cure me forever!

 And this is from a co-worker who was able to take advantage of this opportunity with this beautiful wife before Cancer took her from us. (RIP Alice)

Time.  I have done a pretty good job until now with seizing every moment that I can....but there has been a few years where I also got in the mode of just surviving the moment vs. seizing it.  Those days are over.  I will NOT EVER forget how precious every single moment is and will life it to it's fullest potential!  I feel a little fire burning in my belly (probably where Bertha used to be!). 

Cancer has totally, absolutely SUCKED....but there are some good things that have come from it too.  Wow.  Just look back at the images in this post....  Wow.  I got gifts of time.  Wow.  Whodathunkit?

Wow.

Wow.

WOW.

I've totally got this...

❤️,
Bubba 

This made me laugh!

I was just writing in my journal about how I need to be patient and not worry about how much weight I'm gaining during chemo.  It is what it is and I just need to chill.  Whenever my heart rate elevates right now, it makes me feel sick....so I've just been keeping it steady.  I don't do my 30 flights of stairs anymore at work....I just walk down the 15 flights + walk back up 3.  That'll have to do for now.  

I was feeling a little down about it all when I look on facebook and saw this!

OK!  OK!  *THIS* is funny!  *THIS* is exactly how I feel right now!  

I'll get my endurance back next year.  I *WILL* be able to keep up with my little speed demons on the agility field.  But for now, I just need to take it easy on myself, keep my spirits high and positive, and laugh as much as possible.

I've totally got this...

❤️,
Bubba 

The Impact of Chemo Brain

There is a documented side effect called "Chemo Brain".  Here's what Google says about it:  Chemo brain is a common term used by cancer survivors to describe thinking and memory problems that can occur after cancer treatment. 

Every Cancer survivor that I've ever talked to has had it.  My Mom had it.  I've started noticing little things here and there....but this morning...it's confirmed.  I've got it.

Here's what happened....

I was in a deep sleep when all of a sudden I woke up with a jolt because I heard it pouring down rain outside.  It was a little before 5AM.  My immediate thought was "OMG!  I HOPE I DIDN'T LEAVE MY SUNROOF OPEN ON HOT LAVA (my car)!!!"  I tried to look outside but it was too dark.  OMG!  OMG!  I can't remember if I closed it last night or not!  OMG!  I started panicking and hyper ventilating so I decided to just run outside to check it out for myself.

I ran down the stairs.
Swung open the front door.
BOLTED to the gate!
Opened it.
SPRINTED to my car! 
Opened the driver door.
Felt the roof to make sure it was closed.

WHEW!

I breathed a HUGE sigh of relief!

CLOSED!!

....it was then that it dawned on me.....because of night sweats I no longer wear PJ's (or anything else) to bed.

Thank goodness it was still dark outside.

I've totally got this...

❤️,
Bubba 

The word "fatigue" has new meaning

I had hopes of posting something like the 12 days of Living with Cancer but my brain is mush and I have a new respect for the word "fatigue".  I cannot seem to get enough rest these days.  Ugh.  My 12 goes something like this....

12 hours of sleeping.
11 minutes to feed the dogs and myself.
10 minutes to change my sheets.
9 more hours of sleeping.
8 minutes to get the energy to get out of bed.
7 minutes to feed the dogs and me.
6 minutes to respond to messages on my phone.
5 hours of sleeping.
4 hours more because 5 wasn't enough.
3 blinks of an eye and the days seem to be flying by.
2 be Cancer free is what I want to be!
1 bound and determined person that January will be the LAST chemo.  This kind of life absolutely SUCKS!

I've totally got this...

❤️,
Bubba 

My Christmas Tree this year is PERFECT!

I don't have the energy for a big Christmas tree this year, but Bailey Monster found me the PERFECT substitute!  It's PERFECT for this year!  Small, simple, Snoopy, and a bit of HOPE sprinkled in.  Yep.  PERFECT!  

And here's a few other PERFECT Christmas decorations for this year:

 I wish I could figure out how to post the video of this!  It lights up and makes me SOOOO happy!

How I am approaching EVERYTHING in life these days!  Plus it keeps my head warm!

BOOM!

 I've totally got this...

❤️,
Bubba