Saturday, July 15, 2017

One year ago...

Wow.  What a year.  It's been exactly one year ago today that I heard the words "You have Cancer.".  MAN WAS I EVER PISSED!  I remember thinking to myself....how the hell can she (she being my OB-GYN) know I have Cancer from just an ultrasound?!?  She should be more careful about just throwing that word around.....  I promptly got on the phone and called my Primary Care Physician because she had pulled me thru my relationship crap and I had gotten quite close to her.

To my dismay I learned that ultrasounds have come quite a long way since my Mom was diagnosed and, yes, in fact you CAN tell if a mass is Cancer.

FUCK!

I absolutely did NOT know what to do.  I remember just looking up to the sky and screaming "REALLY?!?!".

Fast forward to today.  This happened this morning....

 



And the grand finale for extra credit....I did this!  In purple spandex!  WOO HOO!!!  

 I then went to visit my tie dye dude at the flea market to tell him I survived!  He was estatic.  I have 3 new tie dye shirts.  I also ran into an agility friend at Sassool by coincidence so we had lunch together!  She knew my parents so it was no coincidence that I happened to run in to her TODAY.
I could have shriveled up in to a dark corner and just given up on life last year.  I sure had PLENTY to kick me down....but instead I choose life!  And I.... 

Bertha, you are not welcome here anymore.  

Always forward, never back,
,
Bubba
CEO of Save My Ass Technologies, Inc.

Saturday, July 8, 2017

A day filled with beauty and peace

WOW!  What a fantabulous day today!  This morning started early with a 5K, followed by yoga (my first time ever), then finishing with a sound bath meditation.  I am not kidding when I say this...I walked away from this event feeling better than I have in my entire life!  Something really, really, REALLY good is going on inside and I am LOVING it!  

For one thing, I am surrounding myself with happy, positive people who bring out the best in me.  It makes a HUGE difference!  And when I'm at peace, people just gravitate to me.  For the 5K, I was walking with a friend who is as directionally challenged as I am....but we had these two Indian ladies walking with us, total strangers, who kept us on track.  We joked that she was our living, breathing GPS!  We'd get ahead of them, start jibber-jabbering, forget where we were, then when we came to a fork in the path, the lady behind us would yell "RIGHT!" or "LEFT"!  LOL!  Then when we came towards the end she encouraged us to take the long way back to the parking lot to get the yoga mats because then we'd seize every moment that we could!  These ladies were fantastic and I really think I will see them again.  They are in the yellow and gray t-shirts behind the lady w/the sign.  My 80's ladies are the 3 directly behind me. 

Following the event I stopped at the new juice bar in Wake Forest and gave my body some fresh greens!  YUM!

For the afternoon, I took my neighbor out for an adventure and we found the sunflower fields!  WOWSA!  They were absolutely STUNNING!  Taller than last year!  WOW!
 This one is my absolute FAVORITE!  All you can see is my peace sign!  LOL!

 

And then to wrap up the day, the most majestic butterfly decided to stop by and smell my wildflowers.  It was the most beautiful that I have ever seen.  She had 4 wings and her colors were so vibrant that they made my eyes leak a little.  Nature is so beautiful!  She flew all around me, smelling a lot of the different flowers.  I said to her out loud "you're welcome for the flowers!" :)  It was magic.


The best thing I can do to keep Bertha and all her little wannabees from becoming active again is to keep myself healthy and happy.  Today during the sound bath I imagined my body fighting all the Cancer cells.....and winning....  

Bertha, you are not welcome here anymore.  

Always forward, never back,
,
Bubba
CEO of Save My Ass Technologies, Inc.

Tuesday, July 4, 2017

What The Health?

I watched this show today on Netflix and am more convinced than ever that the Crazy Sexy Diet is the way to go!  ABSOLUTELY!  WOW!

 



Bertha, you are not welcome here anymore.  

Always forward, never back,
,
Bubba
CEO of Save My Ass Technologies, Inc.

July 1 is significant

July 1, 2016 marks the day that Dr. Gizzie said the word "Oh." in a way that I will never, EVER forget.  
That was the first moment that Big Bertha was acknowledged.  
It was the day my life took a completely unexpected left turn.  
I had absolutely NO IDEA that what my OB-GYN was feeling was a big ass tumor of Follicular Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma and that I was about to learn the core meaning of life. 
I had just been thru a living hell during the first half of 2016 so I really didn't take what Dr. Gizzie felt seriously.  I was seeing 3 therapists and working so hard on my mental health that I just nodded my head when she told me I needed to go get a ultrasound....

Yea.
Whatever.

Thank GOD that I kept that appointment.
Thank GOD that thru all those therapy sessions I had managed to pick up all the pieces of my life and put them back together differently.  This "new" me was stronger.  MUCH, MUCH STRONGER than I had ever been before.  This new me could handle a diagnosis of Cancer.

I truly believe that there are no coincidences in life.  Everything happens for a reason and sitting here on my porch, hanging out with my pack o' crazy dogs, I must say that life is better than it's ever been....

The people who are in my life right now are AMAZING!  I LOL every single day!
My relationship with my soulmate is better than it's ever been!  I canNOT WAIT to help her plan her wedding!
I actually wore a tank top and SPANDEX out in public, plus my hair was in a headband!  And by the time I got home my stomach hurt because I laughed so much it, literally, hurt!

Yes, I've lost a couple Warriors along the way, but that's their problem, not mine.  The old me would have fretted and worried and jumped thru hoops to make that better...but then that also meant that I was not being my true self.  I was being whatever I thought that person wanted from me so they would still love me.  Now I stand strong on my own and let that shit go.

I went to a birthday party last night and the birthday boy was asked, what he thought about this birthday (he turned 56).  He mentioned a lot of things that he was thankful for, but the one that struck me the most, right in the heart, was he said the 50's have been the best decade of his life!  And it was amazing, but all of us around the table in our 50's started nodding our heads in agreement.  And we all got an immediate smile on our face!  It's SOOOO true!  The 50's ROCK!  And this past year, since my diagnosis, has been phenomenal.  WHODATHUNKIT?!?

So, if you are reading this, I just want to say THANK YOU!  This blog has gotten over 11,000 hits so far which absolutely BLOWS MY MIND!  THANK YOU!  

Thank you for being a Warrior.
Thank you for praying for me, it's working.
Thank you for every smile, thought, email, text, facebook post, card, gift, and happy moment!

I absolutely LOVE my beautiful life and every single person in it!

I could not love these two more....canNOT wait for them to get married!  





Bertha, you are not welcome here anymore.  

Always forward, never back,
,
Bubba
CEO of Save My Ass Technologies, Inc.     



A moment when Cancer did NOT suck

For the first time since I was diagnosed a year ago, Cancer did NOT suck....and it's because this happened:


 


Yes, I was stalked!  But in the best way possible!  CHRIS!  OMGosh!  The nurse who has touched me the deepest showed up (VERY UNEXPECTEDLY) at my maintenance treatment!  And not only that, she brought her BRAND NEW BABY and another one of her little beauties!  OMGosh!  All I could think was....
WHAT IS HAPPENING RIGHT NOW?!?! 
I DO NOT WANT TO BE ANYWHERE ELSE THAN RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW!
 LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I was SOOOOO over the moon that it flowed right out of my eyes!  When the heart takes complete control of your body, those things just happen.  And it was freakin' AWESOME!

Bertha, you are not welcome here anymore.  Like, at all!  Nodda.  NOPE!

Always forward, never back,
,
Bubba
CEO of Save My Ass Technologies, Inc.

Thursday, June 29, 2017

Flowers are goooooood!

IMPOSSIBLE to be in a bad mood with these greeting me every day!
 




Yes, I'm a little partial to these and DEFINITELY planted them on purpose!  
LIME GREEN is such a beautiful color!  

Bertha, you are not welcome here anymore.  

Always forward, never back,
,
Bubba
CEO of Save My Ass Technologies, Inc.

This.




Bertha, you are not welcome here anymore.  

Always forward, never back,
,
Bubba
CEO of Save My Ass Technologies, Inc.

Time for another maintenance treatment

Yee ha!  Time for another maintenance treatment tomorrow.  I'm feeling REALLY, REALLY, REALLY good.  YAY!  

I met with Dr. Kritz earlier this week and he was extremely happy with how well I'm doing.  He even called me an inspiration!  (Yes, that made my eyes leak just a little!)  He teased me about my weight gain during chemo - said nobody has ever had such a reaction to Decadron before.  His theory was that I was sleep walking to the fridge in the middle of the night and pigging out on ice cream.  HOWEVER, the data speaks for itself.  He pulled up a graph of my weight since I've been seeing him and it looked exactly like this....
While he was feeling around my neck area for swollen lymph nodes he looked me straight in the eye and said "You did a REALLY good job with losing the weight.".  I told him, just call me CEO of Save My Ass Technologies!  Yes, I have lost a lot of weight over the past few months, but I did it the right way.  This was my dinner tonight and I honestly LOVED it!


Bertha, you are not welcome here anymore.  

Always forward, never back,
,
Bubba
CEO of Save My Ass Technologies, Inc.

Sunday, June 25, 2017

I almost forgot...

I know it was meant to be for me to meet the ladies at JuiceKeys because this happened....

I had gotten up to leave and saw this on my cup.  Yup, my mom approved.

Bertha, you are not welcome here anymore.  

Always forward, never back,
,
Bubba
CEO of Save My Ass Technologies, Inc.     

It's easy when your life depends on it...

Completely overhauling my diet has been SOOOO much easier than I thought it would be!  I don't even miss the old things I used to absolutely CRAVE!  .....McD's medium coffee w/1 cream + 2 sugar, Egg McMuffins, Taco Bell, Jimmy John's, Zoe's Kitchen chocolate chip cookies, a quick Lean Cuisine for dinner, potato chips of any shape or size, pizza, the occasional candy bar as I checked out of the grocery store, NOTHING organic, I could go on and on... 

I have struggled with my weight for so many years that I've lost count.  

I've been thinking about this a lot lately, and I don't know why I didn't realize this sooner.  The reason it's so easy peasy lemon squeezie for me to eat healthy this time is that my life depends it.  It really does.  No question about that.  I have read too many stories about how people are having phenomenal results from changing their eating habits.  I know deep down in my heart that I will too.  And I'm doing it the right way by educating myself.  Kris Carr and her Crazy Sexy Diet is my #1 inspiration!  


When I got my hairs cut, my hairdresser said I have less gray hairs now.  BOOM!  Gotta be my new diet!

When I went to look for the sunflowers, I rode my bike and there were some pretty long, tall hills to climb.  My legs and heart FINALLY have the stamina to pull me through those challenges!  BOOM!

I worked out at WoofinWaggle w/BG Squeegie for an hour and was able to do 90% of the exercises!  BOOM!

It's all coming together.  My next scan is in August and I can't wait to hear my results.

This is now my new breakfast:  
- Green juice w/freshly shredded lemon
- Matcha green tea w/tumeric
- Organic oatmeal w/chia seeds and blueberries!  

YUMMY IN MY TUMMY!

My mind is starting to fire on more cylinders now that the chemo brain haze is leaving town.  And what I realize now more than ever is I absolutely, wholeheartedly, LOVE THIS LIFE!  
  
This.
Bertha, you are not welcome here anymore.  

Always forward, never back,
,
Bubba
CEO of Save My Ass Technologies, Inc.     

Amazing moment

Green juice is impacting more than just my innerds.  

Last Friday after my haircut, I decided to reward myself with a green juice....and I also had to pee really bad (this is important....keep reading and you'll see why).  I stopped at my new favorite place, JuiceKeys, placed my order, then headed for the bathroom.  Come to find out, the place has an absolutely PHENOMENAL atmosphere once you leave the front area!  WOW!  It's very peaceful and you just feel better by being in the middle of it.  I, literally, said "WOW!" out loud as soon as I looked around.  And as I was just gazing at one super fantastic thing after another, a few of the ladies that were sitting at the tables said "Yea, first time here?  It's wonderful!".

Once I took care of business, I was heading back to the front to pick up my order when a couple of the ladies talked to me again....and this time they said "are you getting your order to go or can you join us for a bit?"  It took me 0.003 seconds to decide to stay!

I had to say "WOW!" out loud again before I left because I hit it off with these ladies immediately.  We talked for over an hour like we had been friends for years.  A lady at another table is the one who took our pictures and even she said "I just love how you all are making new friends!"  LOL!  

A lot of really good things are happening to me right now in my fight to keep Bertha from growing again.  My heart is completely open and ready to receive absolutely *EVERYTHING* that this life has to offer.  


Bertha, you are not welcome here anymore.  

Always forward, never back,
,
Bubba
CEO of Save My Ass Technologies, Inc.     

Saturday, June 17, 2017

These people....

Take a good look at these pictures.....you'll be able to see my heart in each and every one....







Bertha, you are not welcome here anymore.  

Always forward, never back,
,
Bubba
CEO of Save My Ass Technologies, Inc.